I see that hand...

One of the challenges I face is writing without editing myself.

I've spent most of my life regurgitating the standard Christian dogma and to be fair, some of it I truly believed. In fact, there are still parts that I find meaningful. However, I was like most Christians who say many things because they are "part of the package" and not because they have truly discovered that belief for themselves.

In many ways most Christians have not read the fine print of their contract. Many could not tell you why they hold one theological view point over another. (With the advent and popularization of the Mega-Church it's become difficult to find Christians who have any clue about theology. Mega-churches in general are very good at getting people in the door but very bad at educated them once they have them drinking the cool aid.) I have found that what church a person grows up in is typically what dictates the kind of theology a person will have. That seems intuitive to me because to some extend, believer or non-believer, we are all indoctrinated by the environment we grow up in.

However, I have come to believe that our theology, what we believe about God, is far too important of an issue to leave to the ovarian lottery.

Let me Pontificate

I grew up in a church that believed that a person's salvation could be lost. For example, I might be saved today but if over the next year, I began drinking, doing drugs, and sleeping with strippers then my salvation might be in jeopardy. The college I attended also held that view. It was years later when I actually became intellectually curious that I realized that this was a minority viewpoint among Christian traditions. Most American Evangelicals believe that once you are saved you are safe from the fires of Hell forever. (Eternally Secure)

However, most people who claim to believe in Eternal Security are wimps about it. When someone who was once committed to the faith falls away and begins living a sinful life, Eternal Securists will typically say "They must not have been saved in the first place". I find this statement among the most repugnant things I've ever witnessed in Christianity.
It's as if the person is saying "I believe in Eternal Security as long as someone continues to follow Jesus. If they stray from the straight and narrow then they must never have been saved at all." As if getting saved suddenly removes your free will.

I say, if you're going to claim a theology, then stick to it and don't be such a pussy about it.

The theology of Eternal Security in its purest form is actually quit beautiful. The love, mercy, and forgiveness offered in Jesus Christ is so powerful that no sin, not marital infidelity, not homosexuality, not lying or gossip or slander, not even murder can overwhelm the redemptive act of Jesus Christ. That my friends is an amazing God concept and if that is your theology you shouldn't cheapen it applying it only when it makes you comfortable.

I was never able to fully settle this theological questions in my mind before I reached the point of not caring. You can make relatively sound arguments for either side using scripture which makes this a particularly difficult question for Protestants to work out.

My example above involving strippers, drinking, and drugs is pretty extreme and meant to be a bit tongue in cheek. However, if you are honest you can certainly see how this theology of losing ones salvation can lead to a great deal of legalism.

I'm getting far of course…

Part of the reason I started to blog (this still sounds funny to me) is because I wanted to put into words what I truly believe. I wanted some way to express in an unfiltered manner my thoughts on matters of faith.

These days my challenge is different. I no longer care about having the "correct" position. Now, I try not to harm those I love by uncovering the full extend of my disbelief. If my thoughts came out in an unedited flow my cynical and caustic attitude toward the church and Christians would be hurtful.

Christians typically can't be honest with themselves about what they think and feel. They are too concerned about figuring out what a Christian should say/think/do that they can't be honest. So they end up lying.

Let me paint a picture for the uninitiated.

It's the end of a typical church service. For the past hour, the music, the praying, and the sermon have all been building to the penultimate moment when the pastor asks this question "If you were to die on the way home from church are you 100% sure you would spend eternity with Jesus." Then the pastor typically says "Every head bowed and every eye closed" Then he leads all the sinners in a prayer accepting Jesus in their hearts so they can be 100% sure that if they hit by a bus they wont end up stoking the fires of Hell.

Then the pastor continues, "While heads are still bowed and eyes are still closed if you prayed that prayer with me and accepted the Lord Jesus as your savior would you just slip your hand up so I could see it."

This is the part where I typically throw up in my mouth. It's the same every time. The Pastor starts saying things like "I see that hand. Yes, I see your hand and your hand. Yes, yes, hands going up all over the sanctuary. Yes, Yes, I see your hand."

The pastor typically tells everyone to look up now and says that anyone who raised their hand should come down front after the service so he can give them a little gift and get them set up with material that will help them in their first days a new Christian.

There are two specific lies that stand out to me in this little interchange that is repeated thousands of times each Sunday.

1.) Anyone who says they are 100% sure that they will spend eternity in Heaven with Jesus is either lying or too stupid to be intellectually honest enough to admit that no one can be 100% sure.

2.) I have seldom seen a Pastor who did not lie about the number of hands they counted. I always look to see who raises their hands (so what? I'm an asshole.). I've seen pastors recognize raised hands like they were auctioning off the prize pig at the county fair, when in reality not a single hand was raised.

What if Christians were just honest and admitted that on bad days they might be only 50% sure that God even exists. What if a pastor admitted that their sermon sucked and no one had a "come to Jesus" moment? Would that be so bad, would that be counterproductive? …

(Pastor, by the way, don't like to admit that no one got saved because in most Christian theology it's the work of the Spirit that brings people to a place of Salvation. If no one gets saved then in reality it's the Spirits failure to act. Christians and Pastor particularly are very uncomfortable with that so they lie to help God save face.)